Una
Mesa para Dos
Hay
un tío que vive en Madrid. Le gusta frecuentar los restaurantes; y más que todo
le encanta la sopa. Un día, entra en un restaurante y dice al camarero:
-Buenas noches. ¿Tiene usted una mesa para uno?
(1*)
-Pues, no, señor-contesta el camarero-, pero tengo una mesa para dos-.
El tío se queda allí un poco confuso pero al final pregunta:
-Bueno, ¿y puedo sentarme allí?
-Muy bien-contesta el camarero-. Sígame, por favor. Van los dos a una mesa y
el tío se sienta y entonces dice:
-Quiero una sopa de verdura, por favor.
-Muy bien-dice el camarero y vuelve con un plato de sopa de verdura. Y dice
el tío:
-Gracias. Pero, oiga, usted. ¡Hay una mosca en esta sopa!-
Y el camarero
contesta:
-Pues, es verdad, señor, pero no se queje usted. Esta es una mesa para dos.
(2*)
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(
Glossary: tío = guy / bloke, frecuentar = go to, sopa = soup, una mesa para
uno = a table for one, contesta = answers, El tío se queda allí un poco confuso
= The guy is a bit confused, pregunta = asks, sígame = follow me, los dos =
both of them, verdura = vegetables, oiga, usted = Hey!, mosca = fly, es verdad
= that's right, no se queje usted = don't complain. )
2)
That was very funny, wasn't it? But don't get carried away with excitement yet; before
you write your first wonderful joke in Spanish, take note of these technical
points:
a)
The whole joke is in the present tense! (When a native speaker tells a joke
or talks about recent news among friends, they often
use the present. It makes everything sound more immediate.)
b)
Note the punctuation. Speech marks are substituted for the dash ( - ) and do not
close the spoken
text
if...
1)
somebody else speaks immediately after (see *1) or
2)
a new paragraph starts immediately after (even though it is not dialogue.)
3)
the dialogue finishes the story (see *2)
c)
You
can insert 'dice el hombre', 'el hombre dice', 'contesta el camarero,' 'el camarero
contesta', throughout your joke to make it clear who is speaking and make it
sound as though delivered orally. Avoid literary adverbs like 'dice el hombre
cordialmente' (he said politely) if you want your joke to sound the same
as it would be spoken. Keep sentences short and sharp.
d)
Here the word 'tío' is used. This could be translated as 'guy' . eg. 'this guy
says' (GB. 'bloke') ('el tío dice'). For a woman, the
word 'tía' is common. This is very colloquial and common in Peninsula Spanish (from Spain.) These words are
also used to talk to somebody
directly: 'Oye, tío, ¿qué pasa? ('Hey, man. What's up?)
Alternatively, the term 'un hombre', 'una mujer', or if they are children, 'un
niño', 'una niña' or for more respect when referring
to adults, 'un señor', 'una señora,' or even 'un caballero', 'una dama'.
Go
to Lesson 2...
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